In the past, I have done a lot of creative exploits to divert my attention and distress myself from the world. I haven't done much art like I used to but since I moved to a new city and apartment, I enjoyed interior decorating and organizing. I built some furniture from IKEA and bought household things from Nitori, two of the biggest home centers in Japan, that brought me joy. Online shopping has been so easy here due to fast and efficient delivery. I also bought household stuffs from Amazon Japan and Seria, a 100 yen store that sells budget-friendly and useful items, similar to Daiso. Unboxing, organizing, and fixing my new home was challenging but it kept me sane and productive during the quarantine period. I felt like I was playing SIMS in real-life. I made the frustrated MacGyver/interior designer in me so happy! Making a place look and feel like home is a therapy that I needed.

I haven't written a lot of blogs since I came here in Japan. But I have started journaling about God's Word more often than before. For two months, I wrote to God everyday and I was fortunate to share my learnings with beautiful women from Lifehouse Kyoto Church online. Since I went back to my school to teach in June, I have made it a point to journal at least once a week. I hope to write more stories in this blog again.

Building relationships was the highlight of my quarantine period. If it weren't for the plenty of free time, I wouldn't be able to catch up with people around the world.  The Internet has made the earth small. I am enjoying the new features of Messenger, Skype, Zoom, and Google Hangouts/Meetings that made coming together possible online. It took time for me to adjust to it since I was never the person who shows his or her face on camera, especially in a group of people. But these apps certainly allowed me to make connections (to a certain amount that I need, of course hihi). 

The pandemic and the need to stay at home has increased my awareness of the importance of communication with my loved ones especially now that I live far away from them. I talked to my family, mostly with my Mom, almost everyday. I chatted with my close friends from the Philippines more often too. I also maintained my contact with my friends from Kyoto and Hyogo and was able to meet some of them in person at least once a month. I also discovered the need to show more appreciation to the people who are currently in my life right now. I will never know when we will see or talk again so I need to make the most out of every meeting or hang out. Now is a time to pause, reflect, and love ourselves and the people around us. 

Though I enjoy living independently, I wouldn't deny that it makes me feel lonely and depressed at times. I remember my mother telling me about her crazy winter time in 1989 Chiba, taking care of me and my sick brother in a tiny apartment room, while my father attended classes in graduate school. All she wanted was to scream. I felt that suffocating feeling during this pandemic too--as if the walls would swallow me up. But I am really grateful that I have an omnipresent God whom I could pray to and seek guidance from. Despite being quarantined most of the time, He has placed key people in my life. No matter how isolated and free we want ourselves to be, we are never meant to be alone in this world. As John Donne had said, "No man is an island." We all need each other. 

Growth in a Time of Corona Virus

One hobby that I have done less frequently in the past years since I graduated from college was reading books. I have missed the desire to finish a book or the feeling of not being able to put down a book because I am too involved in it. During the quarantine period, I found myself reading in bed with a lamp hovering on my book. I couldn't sleep because I wanted to know what would happen next. I have never felt this for a long time. Now that there is more time to read during commuting hours and down times at home or at work, I have no excuse. There are too many books to read, too many wisdom to learn and impart, and too many adventures to take. The books, especially the novels, inspire me to dream and grow.

Due to COVID-19, my hygiene practices have evolved a hundredfold because I have already been called majime, which means being honest, reliable, responsible, and diligent. Some Japanese words that will stick with me for a very long time are shodoku (disinfecting, sanitizing) and mitsu desu (you are too close). Along with those, I have kept in mind the three Cs (this sounds like the reading strategy I created in my thesis hihi!) that need to be avoided: crowded places, close contact with people, and closed spaces. A Japanese even created a simple but fun game called "Mitsu desu." The goal is to avoid people! HAH! Following this is definitely the hard work, right? Being stuck in a bus filled with students, employees, and the elderly every time I go to work is challenging for me. I try so hard not to touch my face until I arrive at school and sanitize my hands and belongings. But every time I experience flu-related symptoms at home, I become paranoid that I might have gotten the virus somewhere. So I just fill up my body with multivitamins, fruits, vegetables, and get more sleep.

Studying Japanese has been more frequent now that I am gifted with more down time even at work. Honestly, studying Japanese has felt like torture and I get frustrated sometimes. Just like recently, I wanted to give up because it has been affecting my teaching and social skills. But learning Japanese is a good kind of torture. Writing has been really fun for me. I just pray that I will improve in my listening, speaking, and reading skills. I hope that my brain will get better at remembering new vocabulary, kanji characters, and grammar rules. Other than this, I am thankful that I am being led to self-discovery by studying a culture apart from my own. 

During the quarantine period, I was fortunate to teach a child with special needs from Cagayan de Oro City, Northern Mindanao, the southern island of the Philippines. Though our online one-on-one sessions lasted for only two months, it was a very meaningful time for us. I found myself looking forward to our meetings. We were both very sad on our last day. But I was more than happy that their school has transitioned to virtual learning classrooms. Hurray for change!

Even though it feels like nothing is moving forward, there is still room for productivity and growth. We can be proactive in our difficult seasons. We can be stuck alone in our one-bedroom apartment but we can be used for something big. We can be used by God in our virtual community or neighborhood to be an encouragement and a blessing to someone else. He uses the numerous platforms we have today as a venue where He will display His work in us and through us. It is tough to stay physically and mentally strong while living in this chaotic world where everything seems to be going haywire. But God is stronger and He is moving greatly. He can handle this for us better than anyone else, better than ourselves.

We are somewhat stuck in different stages of grief--from denying to making meaning still--and I think that is AOK. The temporary things in this world have no permanent spot in God's handiwork. God removes every mark that is out of place and makes it all work together for good. He moves mountains for us. I still believe in a year of wonder amidst the hardships.