Twenty-Four finds me.

The moment I turned 23 last year, I thought everything was going to be different in an instant. I have waited for that year for so long that I wanted it to be as awesome as it could be. Indeed, many things have happened with certainty, time, and reason. There were miracles, and indeed God was the Maker of them all.

When I noticed that my 23^rd year was close to an end, I began contemplating about my future. Time flies and every second of each minute of each hour of each day counts. I started thinking about my current career path and wondering if this was the kind of job I want for life. In my quiet times, I was always starving for God’s word that I plea, I cry, and I praise Him for everything He has done in the past 23 years. I found myself searching for hope, not only for myself but for people I love and everyone else around me. I started having a heart for things I haven’t felt, seen, or touched. If there was a best year, my 23^rd year would be it. But this is just the start of the best.

In this blog entry, I wanted to emphasize on faith, being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see (Hebrews 11:1). In my past 23 years of existence, I had tons of experiences wherein my faith was tested to the deepest level. Like most of you, I have turned to the One who gave it all. I wouldn’t have survived every breath without Him for He has positioned me with His full armour in places beyond space and time. I am thankful for every adventure for every battle against my way was won with God.

Life here on earth is destructive yet remarkable. Dreams are overwhelming yet achievable. Faith is indiscernible yet enviable. That is why everything that happens, whether good or bad, can be enjoyed if we want it. Each dream that sparks and flies can be achieved if we fight and strive for it. Faith in us can thrive if we only choose to believe in it. Our lives are filled with leaps of faith, the mere act of believing and understanding something elusive, indefinable, and unprovable, once you experience life’s highs and lows. And yet, we remain believing, still seeking.

Now that my 24^th year has begun, I am stopping and looking back at the previous year: one year full of hopes and dreams. Some of these have already died but some I’m still on thrive, not giving up.

I want to share to the world how faith in God can move mountains. Here are my 24 leaps of faith:

24. Family First. One leap of faith is putting my family above everyone else. When I went to Palawan last October 28 to November 2, 2010 to take a vacation from the city, going with my family thrilled me. I got to celebrate my 23^rd birthday by the beach with the four of them with me. Instead of throwing a party with my friends back in Manila, I chose to spend my time with the people I love the most. I knew I made the right decision for it was one of the most memorable family vacations I could treasure for a lifetime.

23. Fear not the Waves. Swimming has always been one of the things I love about summer. The sight of walking on the beach, frolicking in the sand, doing the sisid, discovering things by the shore, and having a tan all make me happy. Still, I have my set of fears. It is weird for I am not afraid of the ocean but the waves sometimes scare me. I had actually taken a small leap of faith by rolling in the waves during Undas in Puerto Princesa, Palawan last year. I have swallowed gallons of salt water in my mouth and gained red eyes after that. I wanted so bad to overcome this fear. This time, I want to take a big leap of faith by learning how to surf. It is what I’m trying to force myself to get into right now. One day, I will ride the waves.

22. Cultivate Friendships. One thing that I learned this year is to take leaps of faith for people I love—may it be family or friends. I believe that cultivating a friendship is very important because you cannot just pop out of nowhere and expect you to be goody goody friends just like that. Time has been my main love language. Despite the busy schedule and tons of activities, I set aside quality time for people I care about the most. In the past years, I have sacrificed my tutoring schedules, study time, work tasks, and even alone time for them. I see it as a way for them to know that they are valued and loved.

21. Professionalism. A great leap of faith is to quit my job for the sake of studying and taking the Licensure Examination for Teachers (LET) last year. Passing the exam, becoming a licensed teacher, and getting a PRC ID were all accomplished because of God’s amazing grace. Though I was not able to get into the LET Top 10, I know that my family and friends were very proud of me and love me for what I do: Teaching. I dedicate this precious profession to my Tatay and Nanay (grandparents). I promise I will become the best teacher that I can be.

20. Just Watch the Fireworks. Every December, I make it to a point to attend the Lantern Parade and get together with friends during the parade or afterwards. Last year became the best so far because I was contented, happy, and not to mention, with company throughout the night. I watched the fireworks with great friends and had a hope instilled in me that someday all of my dreams will come true. Sparks of hope!

19. Selling The News. I was always an introvert who usually sits with the closest people and ignore the ones I do not normally talk to. In fact, I hate being left out so I think it’s better for me not to interact. But God has told me to go out of my comfort zone, make disciples, and sell the news. It was a huge leap of faith for me. I completely entrusted to God the beginning and growth of my first small group. He gave me three beautiful girls whom I meet once or twice a month. I couldn’t believe it has been 1 year and 3 months already. You bring me joy, girls.

18. Love for Fashion. I love shopping, clothes, and models of different kinds. I love America’s Next Top Model and Project Runway. But seriously, I am not a walking model. I don’t follow trends, I follow my own style. My clothes usually portray who I want to be or feel like. But if you see me wearing a band shirt, a checkered shirt, black skinny jeans, black sandals/boots, and my hair loosely down like what I am wearing today on my birthday, then I am truly being myself. Chictopia, a fashion blog, helps me portray my style and get appreciated by people all over the world. Though I am not a fashion icon for I don’t post a lot and I don’t have a good photographer to take professional pictures of me, I get happy whenever I see comments in my blog entries from familiar and unfamiliar faces. They helped boost my confidence and I discovered that I have a voice in fashion as well.

17. Grow Old Together. Every year, it has been a leap of faith for us to hold Christmas gatherings together in our humble home since Nanay and Tatay passed away. It may not be the ideal home for everyone but it is where love resides and stays. I wouldn’t trade Christmas Eve with my family for anything in the world. Wherever part of the world we may be in a few years or so, we had a power of technology to fill in the gap, and I promise, I wouldn’t mind doing it for the years to come.

16. Break the Silence. One of the leaps I’ve had a hard time doing is breaking the silence between me and other people. I have always been a silent girl who expresses herself better in prose or actions without words. I am always feeling awkward. So in the past few years, I have tried my best to be more expressive in spoken words though I still couldn’t help but write most of the time. But to tell you the truth, I can be noisy if I want to. I just don’t think that talking is always the best expression. I believe silence can also balance any given situation. So if I am acting like a hombre silencioso in front of you, don’t ask. Just talk.

15. Ignite the Light. Every time I see fireworks, I feel alive, as if I’m “gotta ignite the light and let it shine, just own the night.” I am not a big Katy Perry lyric fanatic but her song “Firework,” which I first heard in Glee, was amazing. The words she used were encouraging and it was just in time for me because I was preparing for a career, using my talents, and dealing with disappointments life bestowed upon me. I became more hopeful, most particularly due to this line: “Maybe your reason why all the doors are closed. So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road.” I was looking for an open door that would lead me to where I belong. With a huge leap of faith, which allowed the spark in me to burst out and show them what I’m worth, I found it.

14. Contentment. Being single and waiting for *whoishe* is one of my hardest leaps of faith ever. I am already 24 and still when it comes to love life, I have nothing to tell you. I am totally dateless though I could not say there was not a single person who came. Let me just say that I am contented and happy with God and I together. Last February 14, I spent the whole day soaked in His presence. I jogged early in the morning, bought Switchfoot tickets for their April concert in Manila, watched a movie called “127 Hours” by myself, and sat down while eating yogurt at White Hat and jotting down notes in my planner. It was such a happy and memorable independence day. Becoming more and more of an independent person each day makes me proud and happy. God is preparing me.

13. New ministry. Transferring from Performing Arts Ministry to Music Ministry was a decision that I made in order to grow more with God. It was not because PA was not helping me grow but I had to say goodbye to this part of my life. Dancing and performing would always be one of my first loves along with music but it was not a priority anymore. Even though I’m sure I could not let go of it like what happened last summer when I rejoined the PA camp for a dance and interacted with the members as much as I could. When it comes to the Music Ministry, it has transformed me not only as a better musician but as a better person as well. It was similar to the transformation that has happened to me when I first joined PA but this was in a deeper level, more apt with the things I’m going through right now. I am happy God has been using me to serve the church and its people.

12. Work Hard, Play Harder. This has always been one of the leaps I am trying to make each year. I have to travel to a place outside Manila in order to treat myself for the hard work I have been doing. In order to do that, I have to save my earnings for this. I believe it is worth it to invest in travelling because even though I usually run out of money after the trip, the experiences were the ones that prevail. Those are the most important things to me that money cannot buy.

11. Patience is a Virtue. I would always take a leap of faith for any of my passions. I wouldn’t mind lining up in front of the ticket booth for 3 hours at Araneta for The Script tickets, or waiting for feedbacks from different schools I have applied for in a span of 3 months. I absolutely don’t mind because I hold on to the promise that I would have my turn, that I would have my “right time.” But I have to admit, I can do a lot of complaining from time to time as well. I am only human.

10. I Am Called. One thing that has always scared me was that I am not talented enough. But I realized that God would not give me a position or a task that I could not handle. I always think that if God knows what He is doing, then who am I to question Him about it? This was not a ministry of the talented but of the called. Praying, taking away the insecurities, ignoring what other people think or say, and focusing on God, would always be a leap of faith whenever I lead worship, whenever I perform.

9. Never Say Never. When I joined a Switchfoot contest last April, I was taking a huge leap of faith. I made the video in one whole day and I got three days to gather 1,000 likes in my video. I acquired 100+ likes in only an hour and it doubled to 227 votes at the end of the night. Then the next day, I have gathered 478 likes which increased to 849 likes the next day. On the day before the last day, my video has reached 1,059 likes which even continued to increase after the contest was over. I was so blessed!

From this contest, I learned that in all things, do it for God and He will surely give you the desires of your heart. Never ever give up on Him for He loves you enough. He loves to see all of your dreams come true. ;)

8. In Time. God’s perfect time still remains the best so making short-cuts just to get to your dreams wouldn’t work at all. You need to take it one step at a time. If God says “No,” it can mean “Not now” or “Yes, tomorrow.” I have always been tested in this kind of faith, especially when it comes to the school I have waited for before classes started in June. In a span of nine months, I have been unemployed. And when I was ready to work, God was telling me to wait. After I obeyed him, He revealed everything else and I had peace in the choice that I made.

7. Kid At Heart. Maybe most of you have noticed that I sometimes act like a child. I speak in this soft child-like voice and in addition to that, I am petite so I am usually mistaken for a high school student. It is indeed flattering but I also wanted to look my age in order to be respected and valued as a teacher. Many students said I am a cool teacher because I can have fun while teaching and interact with them. But I also know that establishing authority in the classroom is important for the students to believe me when it comes to serious stuff. Being a child at heart is healthy but it would not hurt if I put a stance either.

 6. Restless. Soaking in the Word is a lot difficult that I could have ever imagined. In this world where all things are becoming faster and faster each day, a person who would want to take a break from it all would spend his morning and evening hours to eat his breakfast, turn on the computer, surf through Facebook, go straight to work, work and work, eat dinner, take a quick shower, watch some news on TV, then sleep. Where are the prayers.. quiet times.. devotions? It is a big leap of faith for me to battle with these and listen and look out for God’s signs and wonders throughout those years. Now, He is someone I spend time with every single day, think of Him every hour, and it has become a part of my life already that it is never a burden anymore. I believe that if you put God above everything else, He will give you time for the rest.

5. Passion. I think of passion as a force within us powered by massive and powerful emotions like love, joy, sadness and anger. It is a daily leap of faith to find my passions and cultivate each one of them. People who know me very well describe me as a very passionate person. I adore a mixture of everything: music, dance, teaching, film, art, literature, writing, fashion, food, travelling, photography, and above all else, GOD. These passions are what make me happy, what make me alive. That is why I thrive everyday in pursuit of these. So that in days of happiness or sadness, or both, I will find venues for escape and borders that will keep me strong.

4. Say Goodbye. Goodbyes are the hardest part of a long time friendship. I took a huge leap of faith when I bid farewell to my big sister/cousin a few weeks ago. It was not because I would not be able to see her again but it was because I would lose a sister I could text or call whenever I want to and see in person almost every month of each year. Although she is the sister I never had, she is one of the best friends I have ever had. I will truly miss her! I am forever thankful to Skype and Facebook for we could still catch up with each other every now and then. The friendship still goes on and on!

3. Movement. An action, whether big or small, has to be done with a purpose. A movement, whether fast or slow, has to reach a definite direction. Or else, it won’t matter at all. I have done all kinds of movement in my life, leaps of faith, which have brought different advantages or benefits, sometimes consequences. I am not ashamed to say that my movements turned out to be mistakes at times. But I believe those mistakes have made me stronger and wiser.

In photography, most photographers would prefer a still picture with less background noise. But I believe a glimpse of movement in a photo along with its stillness can add a certain kind of beauty. It shows life. So I think moving is a pursuit to go forward, to add splendour, to meet a destination and to keep pushing forward again. Life has no ever-fixed mark. As long as you’re alive, you just keep moving, going ahead, and making leaps of faith.

2. Give me heart. I have developed a certain kind of heart for my career: love for children, love for people, love for the underserved, love for my own countrymen. Being able to touch other people’s lives is a great blessing. It is a big leap of faith which I will never stop doing. It is for a cause bigger than myself and larger than a group of people. I realized recently that I have to do something about this heart that God has given me. I won’t let it go to waste.

1. Walk with God. In the past 23 years, six of those years were spent walking hand in hand with God. When I made a complete choice to follow Him, I was certain with my decision. I lost my heart that day. Leaving everything behind and being changed was the greatest of all leaps that I have done. I could not say that I was a perfect woman after that but I have had lived a different life which I could say I would never have lived if it were not for Him. It was a life with an eternal calling and purpose which I could not give up for worldly things. I wouldn’t regret making that leap for everyday was one step closer to my final destination. I love you, God. This leap of faith was worth it.

I want to greet myself a happy 24^th birthday and an awesome God-filled life ahead! Choosing to spend this day with God, leading His people to worship, and spending time with the first set of people He have given me and whom I love unconditionally, was just the best thing to do. I wouldn't mind leaping another year!

I want to tell each one of you who are reading this, THANK YOU for being a part of my 23 years. I hope I will have the chance to touch each of your lives in the following years to come..