Motherhood Part 1: Babywearing Season
Friday, October 11, 2024Babywearing, the practice of wearing or carrying a baby in a sling or carrier, was in my To-Do List after giving birth. It was as if nine mo...
Babywearing, the practice of wearing or carrying a baby in a sling or carrier, was in my To-Do List after giving birth. It was as if nine months of carrying a baby in my tummy wasn't enough, eh? Well, holding a baby after birth requires more hard work. That is why a mama needs ample knowledge about wearing her baby safely.
I have been seeing mothers wearing structured carriers everywhere. However, I didn't know a lot about the vast world of babywearing in woven wraps that started in Indigenous communities in many countries. In fact, the terms Onbu or Onbuhimo are Japanese and refer to onbu, the traditional way Japanese mothers carried their babies on their backs, using himo or long and thin cloths. They even tucked their babies inside the obi of their kimonos. Indigenous Filipinos, on the other hand, carried their babies using thin blankets or fabric called ubfan, malong, katsa, and patadyong. Interestingly, we have things in common.
As a first-time mom, I had tons of questions about wearing my baby. Now that I have experienced it and had some of my questions answered, I want to share them here in this blog because someone might be considering doing this too.
I gave birth to a 3888-gram baby. Due to her size, I encountered perennial cuts and pelvic dysfunction that led to bowel incontinence for four weeks. I also had pelvic therapy for six months. You can read more about my birth story here. Due to these, I felt my body was not strong enough for childcare. I questioned my capability to do babywearing right from the beginning.When I reconnected with my former schoolmate (hello Kat!), I heard more about different carriers and wraps. She started her collection before she gave birth. She said that now is the most precious time to get close to our babies because we don't know if we will be blessed with another opportunity to give birth again. She totally convinced me to buy my first baby wrap!
I researched the different types of carriers and slings. Many brands are available in Japan for structured carriers, like Baby Björn, Ergobaby, Aprica, Combi, Artipoppe, etc. Wraps are another world, with foreign brands like Oscha, Didymos, Artipoppe, Linuschka, Lennylamb, Little Frog, and others dominating the market. But not all were available here in Japan so I had to check the international websites. It's all about finding the right wrap/carrier that fits our needs and gives the comfort and safety our babies need.
At first, my major excuse for not wearing a baby carrier after I got pregnant was "I could carry her with my arms myself." What a superwoman! My husband also likes carrying her in his arms when we are out. But carrying a baby daily took its toll on our bodies. I experienced pain in my wrists called tendonitis or "Mommy Wrist." My fingers started to hurt too as if they were overused. I also had a tiny lump that could swell and get bigger if not relieved with pads early. They still hurt until now but more when I haven't used baby wraps/carriers.
Picture this.. Filipina mother in Japan, with no household helper, husbands' relatives and friends are nearby but they are all working full-time... who would carry the baby? Only my husband and I. My husband leaves early in the morning so evening is his only time to care for our baby except for Sundays. What does a momma gotta do in the daytime? I gotta have the right stuff!
Obviously, I need more proper baby-wearing photos and fewer mirror shots. ((: |
I also considered the top benefits of babywearing based on research studies. The main purpose of babywearing is to strengthen the bond between mother and baby through bodily closeness and touch. The second is to maintain the spread-squat-position or M-shape position. According to Dr. Med. E. Fettweis, an orthopedist and retired head physician, the spread squad position is the ideal carrying position because the baby's legs are wide-spread and flexed, and their back is slightly rounded, and oriented towards the carrying adult. Instead of a cradle-side position, which we used to do in the past, the baby should be sitting upright.
Source: https://hipdysplasia.org/baby-wearing/ |
"Conversely, the child of a mother who moves every day while pregnant shows clear developmental advantages. The carried child develops greater physical strength (statomotor developmental, vestibular abilities = balance, skeleton including cartilage, tendons, and connective tissue), greater nerve strength (co-ordination, sensory awareness, and digestion), greater psychological strength (self-assurance, frustration tolerance, deep trust, creativity), and greater social strength (ability to integrate)."
~Dr. Eckhard Bonnet, specialist in paediatrics, youth medicine, environmental medicine, and sports medicine
In my experience, I saw the improvement in my baby after babywearing. The tension and stiffness in her body disappear quickly while in a wrap. She relaxes immediately and falls asleep faster. I still rock her in my arms sometimes but not for long periods and only when I forget the carrier. LOL.
Also, I love that she is close enough to kiss! Who can resist a baby smell?!
Plus, I can do breastfeeding while carrying her in a sling or carrier. Awesome right?
Just keep in mind T.I.C.K.S. for safe babywearing...
UK Sling Consortium, 2015 |
I used a second-hand Baby Björn Carrier Mini for the first six months that I bought in Mercari Japan. I loved it because it was simple, compact, and easy to put on. I usually drive around town so after parking my car, I could get her from the car seat and put her in a carrier in two minutes and vice versa. But her legs sagged in a straight position when she got heavier than 6kg and my shoulders hurt. This could lead to hip dysplasia. Her head was highly supported in that carrier though.
So, I decided to use the Ergobaby Original and Aprica Colan Hug Luxe carriers that my friends passed on to me before I gave birth (thank God for super mama friends!). Honestly, I wasn't a fan of the bulkiness of structured carriers but I also appreciate the safety and ease of use. I prefer using the Ergobaby outdoors because it has a head cover. Then, we use Aprica for quick carries indoors. I really like seeing my husband use the structured carriers and I help him buckle up.
After six months, I also started babywrapping. I am not sure if it was my love for anything woven because I used to weave a little with my little loom... or if I'm just looking for a challenge with using slings. There were many different kinds and sizes in various blends, weaving patterns, and thicknesses which were very intriguing to me.
I chose and bought my first wrap based on WrappingRachel's guide to purchasing a woven wrap. I agree with her, "Buy a wrap you think is beautiful. If you love it, you will use it!" My first wrap is still the one I practice different styles of wrapping with because it's my longest wrap. Its colors easily match any outfit too. When it comes to the blend, I consider the season when I will use it the most. I want something easy care. But I could also do some ironing and handwashing to avoid permacreasing and prolong its quality.
My first wrap: Didymos 1975 Stracciatela |
Based on the few ones I've tried, my favorite is the quilted weave wrap (a pocket weave x2 which is unique to the brand Oscha Slings) due to the cushiness and support for my heavy baby. As for the material, I love the linen and hemp blends in medium to thick GSM because they helped me survive the hot and humid Japanese summer last July to September. 100% cotton wraps are too hot.
My favorite wrap: Oscha Slings Aran Polar Lights which reminds me of Frozen hihi |
The price of a wrap is usually based on the material used (e.g. cotton, linen, silk, hemp, etc.), weaving pattern, design, and thickness. 100% cotton wraps are generally more affordable than other blends. Wraps can be used in various ways not only for babywearing. It can be a fashion accessory, blanket, throw, or picnic mat. It can last for several years when well taken care of.
If you start collecting wraps, it gets pretty expensive. I thought about this many times before I dove into this rabbit hole. This is definitely my most expensive collection now. But I just minimized spending on other things I love such as shopping for clothes, shoes, bags, cosmetics, merch of my favorites, etc. I also avoid going to the salon for a haircut or nail polish. Adding all these expenses up in a month or two is equivalent to one wrap. Palusot (Making excuses). Haha!
The first time I told my husband about my expensive collection, he laughed and said, "You don't need that many." I said babywrapping made me feel good while carrying our baby instead of pitying myself about my situation. I also told him how one wrap could be sold at an expensive price, almost the same as the original price. He just smiled and agreed with me. I also have a limit for the number of wraps our small living space could accommodate.
Actually, my husband is right. I do not need a lot of wraps. But each wrap that I own has a specific use. Most wraps that I bought could be used for all seasons. I usually use a ring sling for quick carries at night when my baby has a hard time falling asleep. I also use a half-buckle and half-wrap carrier during the daytime for my baby's naps. I love that I could still enjoy wrapping while having the safety and ease of buckles. I also have an Onbuhimo for back carrying which is so convenient when I do chores with my baby.
my little stash~ limited to 10 excluding my structured carriers |
Using them on rotation also helps to break them in, experience their utmost quality, and prolong their use. The wraps are worth it as long as they will be used regularly. If your husband could also use them too, then that's great!
My husband has yet to try wearing the wraps. But he encourages me to use them. One afternoon when our baby was crying, he said to me, "You should use the wrap you always use to make her sleep." I was so happy! He even reminded me a few times to do it when our baby couldn't fall asleep at night and helped me put her inside the wrap. I told him that if we had started babywearing earlier, we wouldn't have had difficulty rocking her to bed during the wee hours of the morning during the first five months.
I also look forward to using my wraps in the future if I am blessed with another little one. An alternative is to sell and trade them to the online community of baby-wearing mothers. One of my wraps is originally a shawl that could be used as a fashion accessory. If all else fails, I will use them as a throw or blanket inside our house during the cold months until they get torn by my cat. Awwch!
Structured carriers are easy to use. Wraps have a higher learning curve and need practice to get used to. I was overwhelmed when I first knew about the different styles. Watching tutorial videos on YouTube helped a lot in my practice. Wrapyouinlove is my favorite! Honestly, I got discouraged when I needed more time to wrap properly. But that didn't stop me from trying one style to the other. I am still not an expert but I enjoy learning.
The not-so-fancy fancy finishes I've done: Ponds Finish, Poppins Finish, and Anne's ((: |
I also joined online babywearing classes offered free by Didymos Japan to those who bought a wrap. It takes a lot of patience to learn the styles. Honestly, I still couldn't figure out how to do the back carries and I hate ring slings sometimes (lol). But we can always do the basic Front Wrap Cross Carry (FWCC) if all else fails. Hehehe.
To me, babywearing is a prolonged extension of pregnancy. It's a crazy but beautiful time. It actually helped a lot with my postpartum depression. Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I was happy that I learned a new skill. It made me feel empowered because now I know how to carry my baby in different ways. I still get sore in all parts of my body and I might not be able to gain weight faster due to babywearing and breastfeeding. But I am just grateful that I never got sick since I gave birth. I always remember what my husband tells me: "This is only a short season."
I also cling to this Bible verse, "There is a time for everything and a time for every activity under the heavens" Ecclesiastes 3:1-11. I could only witness this once in my baby's life and after a few years, we would enter a new season different from this.
To you Mamas who are reading this, give babywearing a try! Of course, you should consider your physical condition and the state of your family first. Not all mothers can do it after birth and that doesn't make them any less of a supermom. I started when my baby was six months old and still going strong.
Remember that you do not need to buy expensive wraps and carriers or build a big stash to do babywrapping. Second-hand wraps and carriers will do. I bought two used wraps from Mercari Japan. If you want brand new, most brands have online websites where you can read more about them. You can also join Facebook community groups and second-hand shops to find the best wraps and communicate with and learn from other baby-wearing mothers.
This season is tough but I do not get weary in wearing my baby. I hope I will be healthy enough to carry her as long as my body is willing.
Let's enjoy our babies' first years when we have the best opportunity to savor each moment with them and have all the cuddles, snuggles, and kisses before they move into the world.
Much Love,